For Brenda Hillman (#3)

For Brenda Hillman

I saw you in a store

The other day and I

Wanted to say hi

But started to cry

And had to hide.

You had faith in the work,

The poems, the essays,

The teaching, the talk

Even the music and saw

How it could all come

Together to serve, to create

A deeper community

In this land of the car.

You stood up for me

& strove to ease the

difficult transition.

I was green & I strove

to make you proud

to show I could speak

Shakespeare to impress

the others who didn’t want

or get the Harryman 

or Baraka.

I remember the challenging

Nurturing light you shone

Sustained me in the cold

Unfamiliarity of this post

9/11 place. We shared

Deep subversive Smiles,

as I tried to curb

the New York manners

Where it’s okay if someone

Talks over you because you

Know she’s listening too

And I remember the

Seemingly little things

Like the department meeting

With talk of using a building

The college had in downtown

Oakland as a kind of extension

Campus to serve the city

Community and you may

Remember how excited

That made me feel, and

That maybe someday

We’d have more clout

With the funders to help

Make that a reality. I didn’t

Know.... the terrain, what
You're up against, what

We're up against, especially

Once... the car hit...

And helpless, bedridden

On vicadin, the economy

Crashed so the rich could

Get richer…and I couldn’t

walk....

+++++++++++++++++++++++

no, you can't turn back the hands of time to April 6, 2004....